All posts by S. Flavius Mercurius

About S. Flavius Mercurius

  • The curtain falls on S. Flavius Mercurius

    It is a confusing thing composing your own epitaph, but I will give it a shot. I suppose there is only one proper place to start, and that is with the byline. Have you ever wondered what...

    • Posted April 15, 2004
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  • No guy wants to be “that guy”

    Just about anyone would be familiar with the expression, "Oh no-do not be that guy." It is the type of declaration one would be adamant to avoid. This is a little more than a pronoun game, but...

    • Posted April 1, 2004
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  • Howard Stern finally gets his crucifixion

    Howard Stern might finally get his wish. After nearly two decades of patrolling the airwaves as the self-proclaimed "King of all Media" and comparing himself to Jesus, he might finally get his public crucifixion. It is hard...

    • Posted April 1, 2004
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  • An explanation of Sharpton’s Hank Scorpio Complex

    Come on, you remember the episode of The Simpsons- Homer gets a new job, moves out of Springfield to Cypress Creek and works for the nicest guy in the world- Hank Scorpio. It is the life Homer...

    • Posted March 4, 2004
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  • William Hung’s fifteen minutes of fame

    Singers this blessed with the pipes have the tendency to coast, but not William Hung. Even if you do not watch American Idol, you may be familiar with Hung's now infamous audition in which he "sang" Ricky...

    • Posted March 4, 2004
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  • Pulling strings for the puppet

    Was Lt. Bush AWOL from 1972 to 1973 while in the Air National Guard? The story is hardly new-the Boston Globe broke it during the 2000 campaign-and without any real challenge, it quickly disappeared into the dark...

    • Posted February 19, 2004
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  • Against the grain: throwing rice at a gay wedding

    "I believe we should respect individuals," the President begins as he defines his stance on the "sanctity of marriage." The irony was probably lost on him as he made clear that the rights of homosexuals were not...

    • Posted February 5, 2004
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  • Saddam and Gormorrah

    You have to admit it was a compelling image: the former dictator of Iraq, mouth open wide, saying "ahhh" as a doctor probes his tongue and inspects his matted hair for lice. We've seen monkeys on the Discovery...

    • Posted January 29, 2004
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  • Smoking does have its benefits

    "Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs." -William Shakespeare With the recent restaurant smoking ban imposed in Connecticut this October, I began to wonder: with all the fuss about second-hand smoke, could there possibly be...

    • Posted November 13, 2003
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  • Get off the bus or walk home

    Let the title speak for itself: it matters little to me what transportation our esteemed Yale colleague chooses to return to his campus-just that he does so in a manner of speed and expediency. Both terms would...

    • Posted October 30, 2003
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  • The elephantitis of the Republican Party

    The elephant has been a symbol for the Republican Party since the November 7, 1874 cartoon by Thomas Nast parodying Ulysses S. Grant as "The Third Term Panic." To the party, the animal is meant to symbolize...

    • Posted October 23, 2003
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  • Burnt books smell good, save wood

    What goes on in the human brain during the creative process? Where do our thoughts come from? Could these thoughts be potentially dangerous? What can be expressed and what is locked within? Let me attempt, at least, to...

    • Posted October 2, 2003
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