Making a move

By on October 19, 2011

DEAR LOVELY RITA: My friend’s ex-boyfriend and I got close when he was dating my friend and they broke up awhile ago. How long can I wait before making moves on him? – Craving

DEAR CRAVING: Lots of factors to consider here. First, what was your friend and that guy’s relationship serious or just a fling? Second, note much time has passed since the breakup. Time does heal all wounds, so I’d say that as more time passes, it becomes more kosher.

Third, how close were you to your friend? And are you still close enough to have a real conversation about this?

Finally, just keep in mind that if you and your friend’s ex-boyfriend do end up getting it on, you’ll be getting your friend’s sloppy seconds so always play safe. – Lovely Rita

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DEAR LOVELY RITA: My girlfriend and I have been dating for about three months, and we fool around a lot. I’m ready to have sex, but she says she’s not. Do you think she’ll be ready soon? – Hurtin’ for it

DEAR HURTIN’ FOR IT: Frankly I can’t answer your question, because I’m not your girlfriend. Only she can decide when she’s ready to make whoopie with you, so actually listen when she tries to talk to you about it instead of just picturing her naked.

Don’t even bother pushing her for it, she’ll only think you’re a jerk and then you’ll never get laid. Until she’s ready, there’s always your right hand. – Lovely Rita

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DEAR LOVELY RITA: I’ve seen a lot of jokes about this in the movies, but is there a way to be awesome at giving blowjobs? – Practice Makes Perfect

DEAR PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT: There’s no magic formula, because every guy is different and has different things he likes. Here’s a couple basics though: Honestly, the more you do it, the better you’ll be until you get the hang of it.

Also, enthusiasm is key. What I’m saying is, even if you think his schlong looks like an anteater, if you care about him, shut your eyes and pretend it’s a popsicle. Finally, don’t forget to breathe if you’re going all out. – Lovely Rita

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DEAR LOVELY RITA: I heard somewhere that some guys get really turned on by women’s feet. Is that true? – Wondering

DEAR WONDERING: Yep, and not just guys – women can have foot fetishes too. There’s no rhyme or reason why some people have fetishes for feet, or hands or human corpses (called necrophilia, according to Merriam-Webster).

If your guy gets charged whenever you get a pedicure, bask in it. Ask for a foot massage – you’ll get to relax while he gets off, and you don’t have to lift a finger, literally. – Lovely Rita

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Disclaimer: The Sex on Fire advice column is kept anonymous to avoid violating the privacy of the author.

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