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My roommates and I are already fighting about our living situation next year. We are going to be seniors and have to move off campus but there are eight of us. Do you have any suggestions?
From concerned junior.
Dear concerned junior,
I could understand how this decision is making you worried. Living situations every year on this campus are a problem. The lottery definitely isn’t fun and moving off campus brings even more stress. It’s a confusing time but not a time to fight with friends.
There is always a lot of tension when it comes to choosing who you want to live with. I have seen many groups of friends duke it out and end up with a few less friends because of it. Make sure this does not happen to you.
The only advice I have here is to always tell the truth. From my first column, you know that I am a person who tells the truth even if it hurts, and I am sticking to that. You need to let each and every one of your roommates know exactly what is going to make you happy. The only way everyone is going to have a good senior year is if everyone is content about the living situation.
It gets complicated when there are eight of you. The only two options you have when moving off campus is to find a house or an apartment. I live in an apartment with just one roommate. There were eight of us living in Hill our junior year and it basically worked out for the best. We first let each other know where we wanted to live. Four of us wanted to be in an apartment and four of us wanted a house.
The four moved into a house off of Evergreen, and then the other four had to decide what we were going to do. My roommate and I decided that we liked Broadmoor apartments the best and our other two friends decided on Aspen Glen. It was easy on us because we went by who wanted to live where and it all worked itself out.
Before we made any decisions, we all got together one night and talked about the situation. We knew we would be splitting up but we knew that we were all going to still stay friends, still hang out and still be close. So we realized that it wasn’t really important who we lived with.
Have that discussion with your roommates. Make sure everyone realizes that it is not about who likes who better but who is going to be happy living where they want to live for their last year of college. Let everyone get a chance to talk and express their feelings. Hear everyone out and consider everyone’s wishes.
It is more difficult to see my other friends who I do not live with, but I still make it a priority to hang out with them whenever I can. I also make sure I talk to each and every one of them at least once a day. It is actually more fun when everyone lives different places. We get three different hang out spots, and if someone just need some away time, they have two others places to go where friends are.
I do miss living with seven other girls, just because there was someone to keep me company at all times, but one good thing about only living with one roommate is that there is a lot less drama. I remember when we lived in Hill we used to fight about doing the dishes, cleaning the apartment, not getting privacy and a lot more catty girl problems.
Now that there are only two of us, we both have our own rooms and bathrooms and get as much privacy as we want. We made a cleaning schedule and there hasn’t been drama yet.
So keep in mind that splitting up might not be that horrible. It might seem like you will lose touch with your other friends, but you won’t. It actually makes your friendships stronger because you have to make an effort to see them.
Your only option with eight of you is splitting up, but make it known that it won’t be that bad. Have a discussion, stay true to what will make you happy and be considerate of everyone else’s feelings. Don’t fret; everything will work out the way it is supposed to.
(You can email me questions at Alicia.email@example.com, or you can drop off questions in the anonymous folder outside of the Chronicle office, upstairs in the student center)