She said He said

By on September 29, 2004

Dear He Said She Said,

I’ve been dating this new guy and my roommates and friends make fun of him. They call him funny names and have secret nicknames for him. I’m really starting to like him, but they still make fun of him despite my feelings. How can I get this to stop?

-Bummin’

This is a hard situation, and it is really too bad that you are going through it. Your friends should be supportive of you right now because this is a new relationship, not knocking it. It sounds like everyone might be jealous of how happy you are. My best advice is to talk to your friends and roommates about what they are doing and how much it is bothering you, because chances are they do not even know how upset this is making you. They might think it is funny, but you need to let them know that you really care about this new guy and that making fun of him will not hurt your relationship with him, but your friendship with them. And whatever you do, avoid taking your frusturations out on him. Just try to stay optimistic and let your friends know they should start treating your feelings and him with respect. Good luck.

~ Sara

I’ve been dating this new guy and my roommates and friends make fun of him. They call him funny names and have secret nicknames for him. I’m really starting to like him, but they still make fun of him despite my feelings. How can I get this to stop??

Coming form a guys point of view, I can tell you straight out that some of the funniest moments I can remember from living in the dorms, is making up funny nicknames for the girls that came in and out of my roommates’ lives. There is something to be said for the camaraderie that develops between guys when we all know what we are talking about, but nobody else does, especially when it comes to girls. However, I think your problem is a bit different than that. While we were just poking fun at our roommates, it seems as though your friends are being disrespectful. My advice is to confront them and tell them that their comments are hurtful. If they truly are your friends, they will at the very least, stop doing it in front of you. It is my experience that when people are confronted with their bad or inappropriate behavior, they feel ashamed enough to pull back from the offending behavior. If you get the guts to confront them, I think you will see some results. Good Luck,

~RickyB

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