She said; He said

By on February 26, 2004

Hey there Ricky and Shelly-

Well, I guess I have an interesting problem. I have been seeing this guy for a little over 6 months and I recently found out he has had a girlfriend for the past year. He has been playing both of us. When I found out about the girlfriend, I told him never to talk to me again. But, he just keeps on calling me and told me if I get back with him he will break up with his girlfriend. I do not know what to do. I really like him, but I do not trust him. HELP!

–Getting Two Timed

Dear G-T-T,

Are you serious? You been played for about a half of year and you never suspected anything? Wow you deserve the award, “Most Naive Player of the Year”!
So your question is to consider the possibilty of starting something with this trickster, but I think you already know the answer.
I truely am sorry you wasted six months of your young life, romancing this loser. You have every reason not to trust him ever again.
In your situation I think I would have reacted the same way and told him to get lost. If he continues to bother you with empty promises, be strong! Now is the time to screen your calls.
If you tell him to get out of your life, you have to really mean it. I suggest avoiding any contact with Mr. Two -Timer. If he continues to harass you, consider a restraining order.
I know you really like him, and putting your foot down to his sweet offers of making you the only one in his life are tempting. But can you ever really trust that he will not find lady #2 within a few weeks and continue his old habits?
My point being is your man had ample opportunity over the last 6 months to mention there was someone else. He never got around to telling you because he didn’t want to know. Now why would you want to be with someone like that?
Do not make me spell out what you should do with Mr. Two Timer. Move on. May you next man be satisfied being a one- woman, man.

Best of Luck,

Dear Two Timed

So, try to explain to me how you can still really like someone who has been lying to you for the entire time that he has known you, because I do not get it?
Relationships are based on trust, end of discussion.
Yes, physical attraction, common intrests and all that are important, but they mean squat without mutual trust. How much could this guy possibly like you (or his girlfriend) if he was doing what he was doing for half a year.
I mean, lets give credit where credit is due. I will bet every guys first reaction to reading your letter was, “Holy Crap!! how did that guy pull that off ?….Good for him”
That is the precise reason your guy did it in the first place, to see if it could be done. He obvioulsy did not care what the consequences of his actions were, because he would have kept going as long as he could keep up the lie.
Not only should you not even bother giving him the time of day, but you should find the other girl and tell her. I know im betraying men everywhere by telling you to do that, but gentlemen, I think we can all agree that this guy has had a good ride and we should not feel bad for him.
Just follow your first instict of not talking to him and you will be back on your feet in no time.
~ Ricky


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