For all your love and relationship needs

By on April 24, 2003

Dear Shelly,

I know you usually advocate in making the first move, but I have been trying for two years. Yes, I have sweated the same guy for that long. He has never come out and told me that he wasn’t interested so I keep trying to get his attention. There are less than two weeks left, should I even bother?

-Persistent and Enduring

Dear Persistent,

I am glad to see you have learned the life lesson that persistence gets you exactly what you want. In the matters of love, this statement might be questionable. If you persist, he will take notice, and that might be a good thing. If he was unsure you were interested and you are give him the green light, then I am sure he is going to follow.

Two years is a decent amount of time. If he has seen you and recognized the fact you are interested, and hasn’t jumped the chance, girl, it is his loss.

There are probably some great things about you this man has not noticed. If he saw all your good qualities and still didn’t come around, he is either a) a fool, or b) asexual. In either case, reason alone may not work in persuasion.

Giving up now would be a waste of your last two years of pursuit. Remember, you are not out of the game. What is your game plan for the next two weeks?

What you are going to do is casually run into him, hang out once or twice and make it clear that you think he is wonderful (don’t say it more than once – we do not need an inflated ego). Bat those eyelashes, and when the timing is just right, go in for the kill, full force. The absolute worst that can happen is that he turns his head. If for some reason this most unfortunate scenario does occur, it will only reassure your aforementioned suspicions about him.

If you do have to turn around and walk away that night, you might have a few things to think about. First of all, there is no regret. You genuinely tried. It was not happening on his end.

The second is that all your questions of “what if” are answered. Whatever does come about of your one moment of bravery, even if it was not the outcome you have dreamed about, will at least ease your mind.

Maybe the stars will be aligned that evening, and everything will end as you have envisioned. At that moment, you will never be sorry for your one, shining moment, of being assertive.

Either way, whatever was meant to happen will happen. But the worst course of action above all would be to not try anything.

Best of Luck-


To all those faithful readers,

I would like to thank you all for once again, being a supportive audience and keeping up with the weekly column. Many of questions posed are typical situations individuals will pass at least one time in a relationship during their four years on the college scene. Next semester I will still be dishing advice in the column, so please feel free to correspond.

I want to wish you all the best of luck in the spring and summer months. May the relations continue as the hormones will flow, and may we all make smart decisions.

For those seniors leaving, you will all be missed. Not only for the loss of such leaders or good-natured individuals, but some will be missed for their sex appeal.

I wish each and every senior good luck out in the real dating world. You may never again have the opportunity to have quite a vast dating pool. My only advice is to not sleep with your boss’s daughter.

Until next semester… take care of yourself and each other!




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